I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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