idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Randomize
