We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Randomize