...so i touched it.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
