We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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