help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
This gyro tastes like lonliness
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
