what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
