there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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