You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
one two three fourrrrnication!
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
