I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
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