is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
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I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
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