Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I will be naked everywhere
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
