do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
