i jhust puked up my retainher.
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
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