CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
