all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize