pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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