shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
