omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize