I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
