this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
