I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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