i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
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