you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
