Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
