your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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