Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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