our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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