I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
