dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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