North Korea, Best Korea!
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
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