I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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