ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
