we have pet lesbian snakes
At least make sure they are 18
Why
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
You took a bar mat shot.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize