My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize