That's when you crack a 10am beer
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
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Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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