school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Randomize