A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
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I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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