Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
