Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
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