went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
