Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
