I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
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