Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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