no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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