You can't motorboat a personality
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize