I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
