Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
