So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
