last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Randomize
